“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together!” African proverb
Being a teen girl in Africa is a mix of fun and adventure, uncertainty and demands. Most parents are deeply religious and keep a watchful eye on their teenagers – no sneaking out of the house, no going to parties, and no unapproved friendships. No matter, teenage life always has an adventure or two lurking around the corner… Those in boarding school, enjoy fun and relative freedom away from the watchful gaze of their parents. They take risks like sneaking out of school and disobeying their teachers. For those in day schools, the little free time after school and on weekends allows them to ‘gist’ (chat) with neighbors and peers on WhatsApp, watch and create TikTok videos and occasionally sneak out of home to attend parties. Amidst the fun, adolescent girls and young women (AGYW) find the school playground a tough place to be; it often comes with the stresses and strains of negotiating social networks. Being popular takes on extra significance and meaning. There is nothing like a group of girlfriends who like you and are like you. The more certain the girls are of peer approval, and/or the more they have peers who approve of them, the greater their sense of self. The idea of being liked and accepted is so enticing that girls believe that becoming popular will solve many of their life’s problems.
Approval and acceptance = a great deal of self-worth
BUT… being popular comes at a cost. Once they become popular, the girls feel the need to protect and maintain their status. Their friendship circle becomes restricted to whomever the group finds desirable. They start to feel stressed at the loss of personal freedom. Girls start to feel compelled to act and behave in certain ways to maintain their level of popularity. Sometimes this involves drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes, shisha or weed with their ‘popular’ peers. Sometimes there is a thrill that comes with skipping school and disobeying the authority of their teachers.
Strong female solidarity and support networks benefit adolescent girls and young women. Such networks provide an avenue for girls to express their thoughts and feelings to other people. In here, they find identify as part of a group or community that supports them.
